30 Weeks, 3 Days - I Feel Like I'm Dying...

...no not really.  Well, yeah...really.  Sometimes.  This has been a new discovery.  By "This," I'm referring to the effects of low blood sugar.  At least, that's what I think it is.  However, I forgot to report this to my Physician's Assistant at Mayo Clinic earlier this month.  Oops.  Forgetting is a common occurance these days (Thank goodness for smart phones!  My virtual friend "Siri" really helps me record my appointments and reminders on my iPhone, and then the phone alerts me to them on the day, or whenever I leave or arrive somewhere.  Super cool tool.).

Yeah so...if I don't eat on the regular, and/or ignore my body's signals to feed it, then the body simply decides it'll just begin to shut down (Who told my body to do that?). It acts like it's using its "powersave" feature or something.  I guess this is to protect my battery, I mean my power source, I mean my body, so that it doesn't turn off all of a sudden.  ...I experienced this about 3 weeks ago while driving.  Yeah, kind of scary.  All my body kept telling me was to stop everything and go to sleep.  But I'm driving!!  Luckily, my brain knew I needed fuel and I just needed to park my car so I can pull out my chicken salad and eat.  Just pull in and park the car, Shellie.  You can do it.  You can make it.  ...I made it.  (Thank You God for Your patience and grace towards this "hard head" of Yours.)  Eating those first few bites of that chicken salad was like someone doing CPR on me.  I felt like I was being revived - brought back to life.  That's how it feels, for real...

It happened again when picking up my kids from the airport the other day.  And it happened yesterday and this morning too.  ... Do I detect a pattern here?...   Forgive me.  Like I said, my brain processes things a lot slower nowadays.  It's working, but it just takes a little longer to pull things together and spit it out. But I just ate a couple of hours ago!?! 

For some reason, my body cannot cope without enough glucose.  Duh.  Neither does it have time or energy to give a warning when my blood sugar levels are low. (Or maybe I'm just not aware of the early warning signs yet).  If I need to eat or rest, and I don't when I first feel the need to, it's already too late.  No grace period.  Eat or die.  That's how it feels.  Different?  Weird?  Alarming?  Yep.

I hope this "low-blood-sugar-self-diagnosis" experience is just the chemo talking and nothing new going on for real...

Right now as I type, I feel woozy.  My finger tips are slightly numb - my tongue too.  And I feel exhausted. (It's only 12:25 pm).  I better stop and lie down.  No not that.  Not yet. That's what I want to do.  But I need to eat first.  If I don't eat before I lie down, I may never get up.  I may die there. That's how it feels.  I better eat first.  Ok. Stop typing and eat, Shellie.  Ok... Bye...

30 Weeks, 3 Days - 2 Weeks of NO Extra Shots!

This is a short post.  I'm just excited to report that - for the first time since I started Neupogen and Procrit injections - I hadn't needed a shot in two weeks!  That's a cool victory for me.  Even my nurse was proud! Does this effect how I'm feeling?  Uh, well... no.

So not to confuse anyone, I still take the weekly Pegasus shots, because that's the chemo.  And I'm still taking the oral Ribavirin too.  None of that is gong to change.  I've had weeks were I've reduced the amount I inject or swallow, but not lately!  I suppose my body is doing all right for now.  I'll take "all right."  But that doesn't change the fact that I am super-dee-duper-dee tired.  My brain is running on a processor slowed down by drugs, you see. But - hey - it's still running. So, I still press on.

Holla!

SIDE EFFECTS - at 28 weeks

WARNING: Casual readers of this blog may find some details uncomfortable. I've included them to help fellow patients or those researching the idea of undergoing treatment. I apologize for any discomfort this may cause.

28 Weeks, 0 Days - Limitations & "Training Wheels"

Wow!  28 weeks!  I remember when I first started treatment and another patient shared that she was 28 weeks in.  I couldn't imagine it then.  And here I am now!

I'm doing well.  I'm still an "undie."
I have 20 weeks to go.  And I'm gonna be just fine...
Whoop whoop!

Many patients get to this point and - having had such a difficult time - decide to call it quits.  In doing so, their risk of relapse is 25% (if I remember correctly).  My life isn't a breeze, but I know I'll make it.  I know I will.  That's a great feeling. You know, having confident hope - unwavering faith.  I can't say that my track record is stellar in this area.  No, not at all...  I've grown to develop this depth of faith.  And this treatment is included in the credits.